How to defeat your enemies:
This is a quick how to guide to defeat your enemies. Follow these simple steps and you’ll be enemy free in no time!

Things you will need:
– hacksaw
– jerry can
– ski mask
– rope
– gloves
– getaway car
– matches
– lighter
– duct tape
– drugs (preferably hardcore drugs)
– knives
– gun
– laptop
– decoy phone

Step 1:
Write out a plan.
Some plans could be to do a stealth kill or some plans could be to do a more noticeable gruesome kill.

Step 2:
Gather the necessary supplies to excite the plan you have chosen.

Step 3:
Execute your chosen plan.
Once you have finished planning and gathering the supplies. It is now time to excite the plan. Do it carefully now and don’t get caught. Always hide your tracks.

Step 4:
Hide the body
Find a good place to hide the body. Best case is to throw into a good deep body of water. Another idea is to throw into an abandoned building, make it look like they blew their brains out and the burn down the building.

Step 5:
Get that putang/dick
After you killed off the competition, now it’s time to go for another type of kill. Get that putang/dick, baby.

Warnings:
This is illegal
If you go through with this you need therapy
You might be psycho
Your crush probably will find out
They’ll think you’re nuts
Which you are
Then you’ll have to kill them too

Tips:
Always hide your tracks
Never tell a soul about what you just did
Never feel any guilt
They had it coming
Don’t get caught
See a therapist afterwards
But don’t tell the therapist about it
Buy everything with cash
And lastly have fun