I’m Sam Waterston, of the popular TV series “Law & Order”. As a senior citizen, you’re probably aware of the threat robots pose. Robots are everywhere, and they eat old people’s medicine for fuel. Well, now there’s a company that offers coverage against the unfortunate event of robot attack, with Old Glory Insurance. Old Glory will cover you with no health check-up or age consideration. [ SUPER: Limitied Benefits First Two Years ] You need to feel safe. And that’s harder and harder to do nowadays, because robots may strike at any time.
[ show pie chart reading “Cause of Death in Persons Over 50 Years of Age”: Heart Disease, 42% – Robots, 58% ]
And when they grab you with those metal claws, you can’t break free.. because they’re made of metal, and robots are strong. Now, for only $4 a month, you can achieve peace of mind in a world full of grime and robots, with Old Glory Insurance. So, don’t cower under your afghan any longer. Make a choice. [ SUPER: “WARNING: Persons denying the existence of Robots may be Robots themselves. ] Old Glory Insurance. For when the metal ones decide to come for you – and they will.