How is everybody here getting so many matches? I keep seeing women stating in their profiles that they want somebody who’s smart/funny, and my family and friends tell me I’m funny, but I only have like, three matches, and none of them have carried on the conversation. So what gives? I’ll tell you what’s wrong, all this swiping culture shit, where all I am is a fucking card. I even hear Tinder uses ELO, like we’re all playing some TCG or some shit. This is why romance is dead. I’m seriously considering seeing an escort when all this stuff with Covid is over. I’m a 28-year-old “relationship virgin.” That’s unacceptable, and absolutely pitiful. And I’m not getting any younger, so if I’m not making progress with somebody by the time this is all over, I’m going to just bang some whores because YOLO, and I’m just gonna give up. And I’ll proudly tell my extended family that I lost my virginity to some random tart, because swiping culture killed romance for my generation, and as a result, I had no choice but to improvise. Maybe it’s that I don’t have enough of an edge, that I’m too wholesome, and I keep seeing a decent amount of trashy/slutty-looking women with septum piercings and shit, like it makes me want to wave around a red napkin. Maybe I am literally too good for this world, and that these women don’t want a man, they want a demigod. At any rate, I’m sick of being teased with what I can’t have, and I may just quit online dating now and get an escort now. I don’t know if I even care if I get a disease, I’m 28, and I want everything, and I want it yesterday, because I’m a winner, and winners don’t stay virgins – let alone relationship virgins – in their late 20s. I’m not gonna be some lonely nerd who has to settle for something lesser in their mid-30s because that’s all he can get. I want it all, and I don’t care if I destroy myself in the process! Because I take the phrase “doesn’t matter, had sex” seriously, especially at my age.