The time was Friday night. I finished my sophomore year of high school. When I went in my room to go to bed, I decided to jerk off in celebration of another school year being completed. I then proceded to steal the lotion from the bathroom, go on my Chromebook in incognito mode and go to Pornhub. I found a video I liked, and wacked my dick. 30 minutes later I came, but I was red and not white. I then knew I wasn’t cum, but I bled out of my cock. I decided to tell my parents the next day that I was peeing blood, not ejaculating blood. They took me to the ER, where they diagnosed me with urethral cancer. I only have two months to live, so I decided to go to Reddit and make a fake story about this *no guys seriously im trolling u guys pls dont believe me im making an edgy joke here*