I told you about the biggest moment in my life (how I got a Solo win on Fortnite) and all you can say is freaking lol? We’re speaking on text, and you Laugh Out Loud?! I want to see how funny you think it is when I slam your door down and punch you multiple times in the stomach, making you cough. Using my button mashing skills, I’ll punch you so frequently a second, it won’t appear like you’re convulsing, no, no dear millennial, it will appear as you are laughing so hard that you break the freaking sound barrier. Then, when you lungs start breaking, I will get your fancy IPhone XR and stuff it down your freaking throat, causing you to suffocate on a compilation of silicon and plastic. Then, when you’re just about to die, holding on to me for mercy, I will throw it off my leg and laugh out loud.
Then I will walk away, typing lol Into our DM, vibrating your phone, causing your jaw to break. Your last scream of pain will not be heard under the incessant quacking of your ring tone.
Lol jk